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The 2017 Bears’ Greatest Sin: They Are a Bore

| November 14th, 2017

Sometimes fans and football media (bloggers too, for that matter) get so wrapped up in the particulars of NFL action they lose touch with the bigger picture. Snap counts. A-gaps. Running into run looks. Drama between GM and coach. It’s all the stuff that allows us to fill space – whether that’s a newspaper column or blog post or Twitter feed. And with only 60 minutes of game action a week, it’s not that easy to six days of space. Hell, there’s a reason the Chicago Tribune has about nine people covering the Bears.

But this whole sports thing is supposed to be entertaining. This is supposed to be something we do for enjoyment. Yes, for the media it’s a job but these guys aren’t covering Afghanistan or sex abuse scandals or gun violence in Chicago. This is all supposed to be fun. And the 2017 Chicago Bears are not entertaining. They are not enjoyable. They are not fun.

They are a massive fucking bore. And that alone should be enough to get people fired.


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The empty seats at Soldier Field Sunday – against the team’s oldest rival, with actual things on the line – were just the beginning. The Lions are coming to town in the thick of a playoff hunt with a fan base that loves traveling south to Chicago and annoying the shit out of me in Rossi’s. What is that building on the lakefront going to sound like when half the seats are silver and blue?

The Bears have the awful Niners at Soldier Field in December. Who is going to that game?

They have the worst organization in the history of pro sports, the Cleveland Browns, coming to Soldier Field on Christmas Eve!! Who is going to THAT game? Oh that’s right, I am! You’ll see me on television. I’ll be the guy in the stands.

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Preseason Bears Roster Falls To Lions (Rapid Fire)

| January 4th, 2016

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Another coin flip game, another coin flip loss. No reason to dissect every element so here are a few thoughts from inside the ballpark you might find interesting.

  • John Timu ran the defense. And I mean ran it. Called the signals, made adjustments, pursued on every play. You’d have thought he was a six-year veteran. Impressive stuff.
  • Kyle Long could barely walk at times after his early injury. He’s a tough SOB. But I kept wondering what reasons Bears could have to keep marching him out there.
  • Pernell McPhee’s criticism of Bears fans at Soldier Field is warranted. The noise produced downstairs – from goal line to goal line – is slight. Most of those people seem to have no understanding of when a home crowd is needed. They were louder for the Dunkin Donuts race on the big screen than any third down on defense.

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Kate Grossman: I Don’t Like You

| July 2nd, 2014

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There are some great people working over at the Chicago Sun-Times, most notably friend of the blog and Bears beat man Adam Jahns. But it is impossible to ignore the fact that many of the newsrooms around this country are populated by daft, insignificant morons.

Kate Grossman is one of those. Hell, she might even be two of them. The Sun-Times editor was on some dopey chat show, sliding off her chair at the very thought of a George Lucas museum on the lakefront. The museum would, of course, be the nail in the tailgating coffin for Chicago Bears fans at Soldier Field.

I’ve pulled the quotes from a blog over at ChicagoNow and thank emailer Laura for the notification:

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Green Bay Packers at Chicago Bears Game Preview: Aaron Rodgers Returns for NFC North Division Title Bout

| December 26th, 2013

packPhoto from the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel

While the national media wanted to turn Sunday night’s debacle into a Jay Cutler debate (they failed), those of us who’ve watched every snap of this Chicago Bears season know better. The Bears as currently constructed and currently performing can’t beat an opponent they trail by 14-21 points. Why? Because two things have to happen for a team to eradicate a deficit that wide: they have to stop the run and they have to create turnovers. But the Bears are so bad at stopping the run the opponent never needs to throw the ball and thus the opportunity for turnovers does not present itself.

So with a defense so incapable of stopping the run…and the pass, for that matter…

Why do I like the Chicago Bears this week?

I always like the Chicago Bears.

FIRST, A RODGERS THOUGHT OR TWO…

  • I know he’s a remarkable player but his playing Sunday does not drastically impact my opinion on the game. I thought Matt Flynn and the Packers offense would have continual success moving the ball down the field on the Bears defense. How many more points does Rodgers create? 7-10? At most? Well I’ve got them in the 30s already…

BUT WHAT FOOTBALL REASONS, JEFF?

  • Bears defense since the bye week (and the Briggs/Tillman injuries that proceeded it) has not been bad at home in the least. They lost to Detroit, giving up only 21 points. They beat Baltimore, giving up only 20 points. They thrashed Dallas, giving up 28 points and 7 of those on a last-minute Kyle Orton drive that seemed to define garbage time. Their road form has been abysmal but this contest is at Soldier Field.
  • Packers are 1-2 on the road since the Rodgers injury, beating only the Cowboys in one of the NFL’s greatest collapses. In those three road games they’ve allowed 103 points.

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Dallas Cowboys at Chicago Bears Game Preview

| December 5th, 2013

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Note: It is very difficult to write a game preview for Monday night’s game with the Dallas Cowboys without knowing the outcome of the Detroit-Philadelphia game Sunday. Why? Because I think that result will greatly impact the energy in the Bears locker room and the enthusiasm of the faithful on a frigid night at Soldier Field. If Philly beats Detroit, the Bears will have an opportunity to win a single game and put a ton of pressure on the Lions down the stretch. Will they end up winning the division? More than likely not. But I don’t think it’ll be because Detroit wins out.

Why do I like the Chicago Bears this week?

I always like the Chicago Bears.

BUT WHAT FOOTBALL REASONS, JEFF?

  • Bears are 4-2 at home. Cowboys are 2-4 on the road. That, folks, is a trend.
  • Jeff Hughes will be sitting around the fifty yard-line. And we know the Bears never lose when he’s in attendance! (True fact, the Bears have never lost a primetime home game I’ve attended. This includes three fairly significant upsets.)
  • As bad as the Bears defense has been, the Cowboys defense is statistically worse. Dallas will have no conceivable means of dealing with the abundance of weapons presented by the Bears. Think about how many different ways the Bears can attack opponents these days.
  • Bears are most vulnerable against the run (see below) but the biggest knock on the Cowboys coaching staff this season has been their propensity to abandon the run too early in games. If the Bears can get just a tiny bit of a success in run defense early they could force the game onto Tony Romo’s shoulders.
  • I started to wonder midway through last Sunday’s game if Julius Peppers knows he’s now playing for NFL future. I hope he approaches the next four games that way.
  • Dallas does a poor job getting to the quarterback.
  • I think Devin Hester is going to get some opportunities for returns and I think he’s going to get into the end zone.

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