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Divisional Round Gambling Guide!

| January 10th, 2020

Good opening weekend with the bookmakers, hitting on three of four bets. And I can’t regret laying points with the Saints against Kirk Cousins. (Might be time to wonder if the Saints are ever getting back the final Sunday of the NFL season.) Four more games this weekend. Four more bets. (Odds from DraftKings Sportsbook.)


Saturday 3:35 PM Central

Vikings at 49ers (-7)

Over/Under 44

The number one seed in the conference is laying LESS than a touchdown, at home, to the six seed. That’s how close all these teams are in the NFC. Kirk Cousins played way better in New Orleans than I expected and this Niners defense is nothing close to what it was over the first half of the season. Shootout. Bet: Over 44


Saturday 7:15 PM Central

Titans at Ravens (-9.5)

Over/Under 46.5

I’ve stared at this number all week and my choice is coming down to one player: Derrick Henry. Do I think he’ll be enough to beat the Ravens? No. But I think he’ll be enough to keep the game close. Bet: Titans +9.5.


Sunday 2:05 PM Central

Texans at Chiefs (-9.5)

Over/Under 51

Andy Reid just drew the worst team remaining in the playoffs. Andy Reid’s nemesis, Bill Belichick, is gone. The stage is set. This should be ho-hum, 31-14, coast into the AFC Championship game. Bet: Chiefs -9.5.

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How to Wager $100 on Super Bowl LIII

| January 30th, 2019

Today’s offering is not meant to advocate gambling. I do advocate gambling because it’s a shit ton of fun but that’s not the intention of this particular column. Today, I will be showing you how to spend a mere $100 to greatly increase your enjoyment of another Super Bowl featuring the New England Patriots.


Bet 1

$15 on the game being decided by exactly 3 points (+375)

The Pats used to play three and four-point Super Bowls exclusively and this doesn’t feel like a game that can go wildly in any direction. Plus you’re getting almost 4-1 odds on the bet so why not? It’s also far more fun to root for close games.


Bet 2

$25 on over 56.5 points (-110)

Always bet the Super Bowl over. Who the hell wants to root for teams not to score, especially when you don’t care about the result? This is the most fun bet to place for a Super Bowl party because even those who don’t know/care what’s happening on the field will be excited to know every single point scored helps them win a little cash.

[Side note: If you have access to a book, legal or otherwise, always incorporate everyone at your Super Bowl party in at least one bet TOGETHER.]


Bet 3

$20 on no field goals in the second quarter (+240)

I have almost no rationale for this bet other than (a) it’s silly and (b) I think these are two coaches who will understand the uselessness of field goals in a game like this.


Bet 4

$40 on a team scoring in the final 3:30 of the game (-170)

By the fourth quarter a lot of non-football fans are checked out on the game. So this is the bet to get them re-motivated to focus on the television set. And since the assumption on this game is that it’ll be high-scoring and close, how is the game going to remain scoreless over the final three and a half minutes? It’s not. The odds aren’t great here so you’ll have to lay out some cheese. (I’m betting way more than $40 on this.)

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