131 Comments

Super Bowl Fifty Gambling Prop Guide

| February 4th, 2016

Screen Shot 2016-01-29 at 12.17.09 PM

These odds are courtesy of the great Jimmy Shapiro, who emails the world weekly with various odds.

BET 1: JOHN FOX

How many times will “John Fox” be said during the Broadcast?

Over     1          (-140, 5/7)

Under   1          (EVEN, 1/1)

(Note: From kickoff to final whistle, halftime does not count.)

This seems like it might happen regularly during the broadcast but really why would it? Once the game begins, unless Fox is visible in the crowd, why would the announcers think to mention him? I’ll take the UNDER and feel safe with no worse than a push.

___________________

BET 2: RETIREMENT

Will Peyton Manning announce his retirement in the postgame interview?

Yes      +500  (5/1)

No        -1000 (1/10)

You’re getting 5 to 1 odds on him doing it so you have to take YES. If the Broncos win and Peyton Manning is speaking to Jim Nantz on the stage in a sea of confetti, can’t you see him dropping a reference or two to his “last game”? I can. Don’t load up here but it’s worth the gamble.

___________________

BET 3: SUPERMAN

How many times will Cam Newton do the Open Shirt Superman motion during the game?

Over     2.5        (EVEN, 1/1)

Under   2.5        (-140, 5/7)

 (Note: From kickoff to final whistle, halftime does not count.)

First, I don’t understand why he’d do this at halftime. Is that something he does? Second, the odds are bad but don’t you have to take the UNDER here? This is a terrific Broncos defense and I’m assuming Cam will only do the Superman bit on the occasional touchdown. I think we see Superman make an appearance. One appearance.

___________________

BET 4: “THE COLOR” (A NOD TO DEADWOOD)

What color will the liquid be that is poured on the winning coach?

Orange             5/4 

Blue                  3/1 

Clear                 4/1 

Yellow              4/1 

Red                  6/1 

Green               10/1 

Purple               10/1 

When I gamble on horses, I start at 6-1. That’s where I think you start finding value when picking winners, something this prop is asking you to do. And since RED is a consistently dumped color on head coaches, I’ll take it at that price.

___________________

BET 5: THE TOSS

Coin Toss

Heads               -105 (20/21)

Tails                 -105 (20/21)

I’ve had a $25 bet on the coin toss in the last three bars in which I’ve watched the Super Bowl and I’m -$75. It is the most exciting four seconds of my gambling year. This year just feels like a HEADS year. 

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  • Shady

    Tails it is.

    • MB30SD

      It always comes up tails at my house, playah

      • Shady

        “Swinging past your knees!”

        http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=GZa_5k937hg

        • MB30SD

          Flaming… dragon

          • Shady

            Les Grossman for President.

        • Trac

          Murph said he didn’t have to get on his knee’s. Cough…ahem…

          • MB30SD

            Exactly!

          • DaMurph

            bastard

  • The GP

    Did you guys see People v OJ?

    Travolta as Shapiro looks like Jimmy Shapiro. He looks Wacko Jacko.

    Show is ok. Cuba Gooding sucks as OJ. He’s just Cuba Gooding.

    • DaBearsBlog

      One of the weirdest things I’ve ever seen on television. What the fuck is Travolta doing? Does Shapiro look or sound like that? Oh and I get it…Marcia Clark smokes.

      • MB30SD

        She is yucky.

        I envision that when she walks by you there’s a distinct odor of what I imagine hakarl and camel lights smell like.

        • The GP

          They make the whole DAs office look like idiots. Clark was a wound up bitch who let the media steam roll her

          I’m looking forward to Nathan Lane as that pompous fuck F Lee Bailey and George Takei as Judge Ito

          • The GP

            Here’s the deal with Bailey: dude was a loser

            He lost the Patty Hearst case 20 years before OJ due to being low energy as Trump says and then he gloms into OJ what a circus

          • Trac

            The Dr. Sam Sheppard trial made his career.

          • Bender McLugh

            Clark was going through a nasty divorce apparently, and had young Bob Ross pics as her hair style model. Work that curl gurl.

          • MB30SD

            Happy little tree right there?

          • Huge Bear’s Penis

            not sure about a happy little tree, but I bet she had a happy little bush

            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x1JKAyxk9cs

          • MB30SD

            Oooohhhh myyyyyyy!

          • The GP

            “I find your testimony makes me want to go to Warp 7”

          • AlbertInTucson

            I believe F. Lee was eventually was disbarred in 2 states.

      • The GP

        Jarrod Bunch would have crushed it as OJ. Shapiro needed a 50 year old Martin Landau or 60 year old Robert Loggia.

        The real Shapiro was a Hollywood bottom feeder who had never litigated a trial case before that’s why he went running to Cochran.

        Travolta is playing him like he’s Bruce Jenner meets mister magoo.

        It’s better than Schwimmer as Kardashian. Apparently he decided he will just play Ross from friends again with a stupid wig

        • willbest

          Most actors just play at being themselves. Its even worse on the female side. Then again most casting agents aren’t really casting based on skill.

      • BearDown100393

        Kirk Lazarus was born to play OJ.

    • Shady

      Didn’t catch it. Did you see that Bernie Madoff show last night? Pretty good stuff. Part 2/2 on tonight. ABC.

      • The GP

        missed that

    • Irish Sweetness

      The real thing was the ffoschizzle.

      Is Jim Carrey playing Kato Kaelin?

  • Bender McLugh

    Bet 4, I like this one. I’m going 3/1 Blue.

    In more important news, Better Call Saul, Season 2 starting Feb. 15th. Can’t wait.

  • MB30SD

    wait jeff… you think car will only get one td?!

  • MB30SD
  • CanadaBear

    Is that a pic of Wayne Newton? Scary!

    • Shady

      Why? So? Serious?

  • Trac

    Anyone having a rough spell or a difficult situation going on?

    Hope this gives you a shot in the arm.

    http://m.poemhunter.com/poem/if/

    • Doc Nitty

      Thanks for the effort Trac. It didn’t help. I’ll stick to inspiration by Metallica.

      • Cutty of Mt. Olivet Nazarene

        boom.

      • MB30SD

        Sorry, but fuck metalica. Dbags.

        Sue their own fans. Smfh

        • Sactowns#1

          Doug Stanhope wants to fight all of them. It’s hilarious.

          • MB30SD

            buffoon

        • The GP

          I have this vision of MB putting Lars Ulrich in a headlock and giving him a noogie on his bald spot. Neither of them being much over 5′ tall, just wrestling to the ground.

          • MB30SD

            I’m the motherfucking american national average damn it!!!!

            You sir, are a heightist.

      • Irish Sweetness

        All hail …..

    • Doc Nitty

      Or this song by Suicidal Tendencies has always cheered me up:

      What the hell’s going on around here?
      First off-let’s take it from the start
      Straight out-can’t change what’s in my heart
      No one-can tear my beliefs apart, you can’t bring me

      You ain’t-never seen no one like me
      Prevail-regardless what the cost might be
      Power-flows inside of me, you can’t bring me

      Never-fall as long as I try
      Refuse-to be a part of your lie
      Even-if it means I die, you can’t bring me
      You…can’t…bring…me…down!

      Who the hell you calling crazy? You wouldn’t know what crazy was
      If Charles Manson was eating fruit loops on your front porch….

      Time out-let’s get something clear
      I speak-more truth than you want to hear
      Scapegoat-to cover up your fear, you can’t bring me

      You ain’t-never seen so much might
      Fight for-what I know is right
      What up-you got yourself a fight, you can’t bring me

      Stand up-we’ll all sing along
      Together-ain’t nothin’ as strong
      Won’t quit-we ain’t in the wrong, you can’t bring me

      You…can’t…bring…me…down!
      Bring me down-you can’t bring me down!
      Bring me down-you can’t bring me down, no!
      Bring me down-you can’t bring me down!

      Just cause you don’t understand what’s going on don’t mean it don’t make no sense
      And just cause you don’t like it, don’t mean it ain’t no good
      And let me tell you something;
      Before you go taking a walk in my world
      You better take a look at the real world
      Cause this ain’t no Mister Roger’s Neighborhood
      Can you say “feel like shit”?
      Yea maybe sometimes I do feel like shit
      I ain’t happy ’bout it, but I’d rather feel like shit than be full of shit!
      And if I offended you, oh I’m sorry…
      But maybe you need to be offended
      But here’s my apology and one more thing…fuck you!

      Cos you…can’t…bring…me…down!…

      Suicidal!

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nxcJW6bs5os

      • Sactowns#1

        Ihttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0xE5f62vPOo&list=PLWEq6pjVW9uKjijuJZfpU2Lae370imhii&index=2

      • all I wanted was a Pepsi!

      • Irish Sweetness

        Ah yes, teenage angst as best personified by the dulcet tones of Mike Muir.

        • Doc Nitty

          I knew you’d feel me, my Thairish brother.

    • Sactowns#1

      Apocalypse Now is one of the best films of all time!

    • AlbertInTucson

      “You’re a better man than I am, Gunga Din.”

    • Irish Sweetness

      Britain’s “favourite” poem. I hate a nation’s favourite anything. That which speaketh to the common denominator sucketh.

  • Sactowns#1

    And in a shocking upset, neither the Panthers nor the Broncos win the coin toss. It appears Hillary Clinton has won, yet again.

    • BearDown100393

      Clintons always call for head.

      • Johnnywad

        To be fair, so do I.

    • willbest

      I heard 90 precincts hadn’t even reported in, or has that issue been taken care of?

      • SC Dave

        Sure it wasn’t dangling…. um… er…. chads?

        • willbest

          What difference, at this point, does it make? A party is in pretty bad shape when their best option is a gypsy communist that can’t do math, and he is going to lose

  • Sactowns#1

    Heading to San Jose shortly to check out the Super Bowl clusterfck out there. Wish ,me luck!

    • beninnorcal

      I just left the one in downtown SF. Eh..

      • Sactowns#1

        Kinda what I figured but I have to head out there for work anyways.

        • beninnorcal

          We were there before the big crowds at least. Today was probably a way better day to go check things out than tomorrow will be.

          • burntorangenavyblue

            What is going on there?

  • The GP

    Jeff –

    Here is your Sprts twitter story of the day:

    Jose Canseco freaks out that Japan’s central bank went to negative interest rates to boost the Yen supply.

    http://fortune.com/2016/02/04/jose-canseco-negative-interest-rates/

    I personally love it when disgraced Roiderz from the MLB rant on central banking policy and drop Wonka references.

    Next up: Mark McQuire calls Janet Yellen’s decision to continue to raise rates insane, and compares her brain to the disease that plagued his forearms.

  • The GP

    Trac –

    You keep chains in the back of that Raptor? Such that perhaps God can lift it up to heaven if the rapture were to come – and then you would be driving the Rapture Raptor? Zoom!

    If so, it would be nice if you used it to drag this little punk down a rocky road at, say, 25mpg. Fuck him up solid but not kill him.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Wt9tTQ1EkA

  • BillW

    Goodell told a women’s network audience that he is going to extend the Rooney Rule to women for all executive positions.

    I assume a GM is a team executive? If so then every team with a GM opening has to interview a woman, despite the obvious fact that (at least today) the talent pool for GM contains no women at all.

    • I have no problem with it, really.
      It’s just an interview. No quota. If a chick knocks their socks off, so be it.

      They gotta extend it to midgets, albinos, and the ever rare, albino midget though.

      • BillW

        I draw a line here only because no where was there a cry that qualified women were being passed over for lack of interviews (as was the case for blacks.Hispanics for coaching and GMs.) But now teams are forced to interview at least one (almost certain to be) unqualified candidate in the name of diversity.

        That’s not how it works.

        • But they could interview as many candidates as they want.

          It’s not like they say, “We can only interview 10 candidates” and in this scenario, #10 who is more qualified than a woman gets neglected.

          They’ll interview whomever + 1.

          No biggie.

          • BillW

            We disagree. Sham interviews should be insulting to the shamee.

          • Let’s face it. The NFL does sham interviews all the time. The good ole boy network.

            How many ppl get interviewed cuz they’re friends or related to someone or other in the nfl?

            Shit. We were just talking about how Wanny shined Jimmy Johnson’s balls, and that more than his own acumen got him some jobs.

            Since 85 bears night, look at how Bob Ryan got a job for so long. He is arguably the worst DC in the past few years, yet he got and maintained that job because of his name, not merit

            When those type of interviews stop happening, then I’m all for a pure meritocracy.

            Until then, 2 “wrongs” might not make a right, but it does at least bring a lil balance.

          • BillW

            Excellent points. I’m just talking about a group of people with no. NFL experience and likely no college either. I’m all for women being included in the interview pool for lower level jobs, eventually leading to GM candidacy. But to force a team to interview a woman for a GM position now is ludicrous.

        • SC Dave

          Of course that’s how it works. Unless you’re a Caucasian male.

    • BearDown100393

      What about transgenders?

    • willbest

      And this is where the BS meter goes off. Women are just flat out incapable of evaluating men at that end of the physical and psychological spectrum.

    • AlbertInTucson

      A guy has a 2″ video tape recording of the first Super Bowl Broadcast.

      The only known copy in existence.

      He wants $1M for it.

      The NFL has offered him $30K and also threatens that if he tries to sell to anybody else, they will unleash the lawyers.

      • BillW

        Wow – two inches? Must be highly compressed!

        I kid.

        Yeah, I posted that a day or two ago. On PFT many people are urging him to sell the broadcast rights of him burning the tape.

        • willbest

          He could actually broadcast a couple minutes of the footage too, before he pulled the reel down and burned it under fair use. And he would probably make more than $50,000 doing it.

          He could invite the NFL rep there to watch it happen. I bet they come up with a serious offer before the match gets there.

          • Trac

            Maybe some day it will be mandatory that at least one “Man” is given an interview.

          • AlbertInTucson

            I’m wondering who has a working 2″ video tape machine anymore besides a broadcast museum or a very specialized production house?

            2″ tape was obsoleted back in the 1970s by 1″ tape and then cassette technology which has also since gone the way of 2″.

            Also, a vertically oriented 2″, quadraplex (4 heads) tape machine was about the size of a small refrigerator. They also came in a horizontal version.

            https://www.google.com/search?q=2+inch+videotape&rlz=1C1RNCN_enUS321&espv=2&biw=1574&bih=867&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjQo7SOr9_KAhVL8WMKHQekAGEQsAQIKA&dpr=1

          • BillW

            I believe he had it transferred and cleaned up professionally. But if he has a digital version then maybe the “cleaners” do too?

          • AlbertInTucson

            His Dad stopped/started the tape to eliminate commercials. There was no such thin as “pause” on 2″. It took about :05 to roll/lock up. Lord forbid if it hasn’t been stored in an upright position the edges of the tape will curl, possibly damaging the control track. Videotape will “shed” over time unless stored in a proper environment.

      • willbest

        NFL can’t sue him for selling his original copy. They can’t sue him for making an archival copy either. They can sue him for duplicating it and selling the duplicate or for not destroying the archival copy after selling the original.

        • AlbertInTucson

          The NFL claims it’s their copyrighted property and he cannot profit from selling it.

          Remember that disclaimer you hear on sportscasts…?

          “…without the expressed, written consent of the National Football league is prhibited.”

          I n ANY case, they have the legal resources to make the guy’s life miserable.

          They could also payhim the $1M out of Goodell’s petty cash drawer.

          • willbest

            It also says “for the private use of our audience” which would include an individual sale. Of course that assumes they even bothered with it back in 1966. The VCR didn’t hit the market until 1963, and cost over $1500. Plus it wasn’t until 1980’s that they had lost the case with regards to video recordings.

            Personally, I think the NFL made a mistake. If they did threaten to sue him, he could now walk into a court and seek declaratory judgment. It makes his life easier if he does find a buyer because he can sue before he completes the transaction and not have to worry about after the ramifications.

          • AlbertInTucson

            I don’t believe you can sell someone else’s copyrighted material.

          • BillW

            I always wondered how literal that could be applied. It says (or used to) any DESCRIPTION without the express written consent etc

            So if I described a touchdown run the NFL could sue me?

  • AlbertInTucson

    “DaBearsBlog @dabearsblog

    I have a cat named Bear. When he gets to high places he’s not allowed I yell, “Bear! Down!”

    That is all I have for you today.”

    A friend has a bear named “Cat”. The bear goes wherever the hell he wants and my friend never yells anything at him.

    • BillW

      Everyone thought it was weird that Tarzan and Jane named their kid Boy.

      Little known fact – in the language spoken in that part of Africa, “Boy” translates to “Sue”.

      • EnderWiggin

        Wasn’t there a Tom T Hall song called Boy named Sue?

        • Huge Bear’s Penis

          Johnny Cash

          • BillW

            At least someone got my “Dad joke”

  • beninnorcal

    Anyone else watching 30 for 30 tonight about Da ’85 Bearss?

    • AlbertInTucson

      I get a little down reliving the fact that that team only made 1 Super Bowl appearance, memorable appearance tho’ it was.

      • BillW

        The tribute to Buddy Ryan is supposed to have been done well. On the downside, they say they spend a bit too much time on the fact Payton didn’t score.

        • Doc Nitty

          I’m tired of hearing about that.

          • Irish Sweetness

            I can’t believe he sulked the way he did over that. That was selfish I thought. Team game, and all that.

          • BillW

            Plus if it meant so much why didn’t he tell Ditka? Or at least Johnny Roland who would have told Ditka.

          • CanadaBear

            Totally agree but that’s where the ego of elite athletes kicks in. That crazy drive and determination that makes them so great has a a bit of a dark side.

      • Doc Nitty

        I know, right? If somebody would have told 10 year old me, in 1985, that the beloved would have to wait at least 31 years to win another one, I would have cursed them for the liar they clearly were.

        • SC Dave

          Ditka

  • MB30SD
    • The GP

      bruuuuuu-tal. I’d have preferred Matthew Perry than him.

      • MB30SD

        I’d definitely prefer rachel

  • BearDown100393
    • CanadaBear

      That tale she tells doesn’t ring true. Nutcase. Not that Manziel isn’t a jagoff.

      • BearDown100393

        I agree with you. Something isn’t adding up. This is the NFL’s version of Sid and Nancy.

        • CanadaBear

          Perfect description. “Johnny doesn’t have to practice”

  • TBC

    That Newton prop is ridiculous. Can you really get those odds somewhere?

    Does he ever use that celebration outside of a rushing touchdown? I could see him doing it after the victory formation, but that would require the panthers to win and have the ball at the end of the game (though that’s not unlikely). Then you’d have to bet on him also scoring 2 rushing touchdowns AND doing that celebration each time. And how is he going to have enough time to do the superman in between dabbing and giving the ball to some kids?

    On sportsbook.ag right now you can get the “C. Newton to Score Rushing TD + Panthers win game” double result for +175.

    I don’t see how you could possibly get 3 or more superman’s without those two things both happening and this bet pays almost double.

  • beninnorcal

    Oops.

  • Bender McLugh

    Holy shit Buddy Ryan looks old…..anyone watching this shit on the 4 letter?

    • SC Dave

      Kinda

      • Bender McLugh

        Same

  • Bender McLugh

    Singeltary looks younger than Lach, shit

  • Bender McLugh

    Makes sense that the four letter is showing this now, two defensive teams in the SB and all

    • BillW

      It was 30 years ago today (approx) Coach Ditka taught the boys to play

      • so let me introduce to you without any further ado

        Sgt. Ditka’s 85 Bears team

  • Irish Sweetness

    Jeff, if you’re not looking at horses under 6/1, then you should not be backing horses. And if you’re betting any of the above, I don’t know what to tell you. Actually I do – don’t bet. It will make you money.

  • Bender McLugh

    Goddam it’s great to see these ’85 guys being interviewed now, they seem to be aging well

    • BillW

      Looking forward to seeing it. Set the dvr but I had to grade midterms tonight

      • Bender McLugh

        Had no clue, need to record it

    • TBC

      “Aging well.” Uhhh what?

      The fridge is all fucked up. McMahon is the squeakiest wheel (still alive) on the CTE wagon and Dave Duerson suffered a horrific end as a result of his football related injuries.

      And then there’s Ditka…

      • Bender McLugh

        Troll!

  • MB30SD

    that cunt martin. motherfucker

    • BillW

      I assume you mean Charles Martin. I hope he died screaming in pain.

  • MB30SD

    “it’s better than a midget”

    Hahahahaha… dent.

  • MB30SD

    god damn… that was a fucking ending.

    singletary might be crazy but god damn. got something in my fucking eye

  • BillW

    My boys were very impressed with the show. That’s enough of an endorsement for me
    And the Charles Martin incident probably solidified their Packer hatred.

  • The GP

    I can’t find it streaming anywhere. I need one of Irish’s Thai IP addresses off the coast in the Bay of Bengal.

  • BillW

    Hey Cheesy. Express your disgust for ForrestGreg and I will take back any bad I said about you. Surely you’re enough of a real fan to know he was scum

  • MB30SD

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