154 Comments

Five Things I Wish the 2016 Bears Had (#3)

| September 1st, 2016

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#3 – A Sure Thing Offensive Tackle (For Protection)

Charles Leno Jr. is the left tackle and I believe was the most underrated player on the 2015 Chicago Bears. Is he a great player currently? No. Can he be great? Unless you come to that question with an agenda, there’s no way to answer it.

Bobby Massie is the right tackle and, well, he’s okay. Good run blocker. Slightly below average pass protector. Massie’s signing doesn’t prohibit the Bears from addressing the position next spring but the Bears believe pairing Massie with friend and workout partner Kyle Long will give them the power run game they desire.

Neither is a guarantee on third-and-seven. And in the NFL it is easy for offensive coordinators to cover up for one struggling tackle in pass protection. Trying to cover up for two puts the offense in a phone booth & limits any and all opportunities for explosiveness.

Remember, the 2016 Bears may not have this issue. I just wish the question wasn’t there.

Tagged: ,

  • Huge Bear’s Penis

    10 days till the Bears FIRST regular season game.

    • MB30SD

      You spelled win wrong

      • Rubyploomis1

        Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours and have longer with friends & family! !ie267t:
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        !ie267t:
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    • 505Bears

      It’s like Xmas with the anticipation, but I hope it isn’t a disappointment like last year when the Bears gave us a sweater and some socks, ugh!!

  • Bender McLugh
    • BearDown100393

      “The 25-year-old Williams was suspended by the Browns for two weeks after
      he refused to play due to an injury in the team’s preseason opener
      against the Green Bay Packers.”

      And then the player fails the physical with Chicago.

      Sounds entirely possible that the Cleveland Browns may have a grievance filed against by the NFLPA.

      • Captain Obvious

        Yeah, and to think Cleveland was shopping him for trade.

        That’s indicative of some organizational incompetence. But then, what do you expect from Cleveland?

  • Irish Sweetness

    Hard Knocks IV:

    If they cut Lamarcus Joyner I’d love to see him come here. One small problem. He’s a 5’8 press corner.
    But just to have that kind of scrapper to put 1 on 1 with those little guys we come up against would be cool.

    Brian Folkerts (center) got cut. 4th year, 26 years old, 6’4, 310. Has played for both the Panthers and Rams. Bueller?

    • BerwynBomber

      RGIII is playing?

      • BearDown100393

        Cleveland apparently is going to play their starters.

    • The Ghost of Super Bowl XX

      we are a good draft away for promise land!

  • GP portrayed by Eric Roberts

    Crapola.

    Bridgewater’s leg effectively structurally failed. Catastrophic failure. His femur came apart from the patella and his fibula, tibula pairing came apart and disconnected from his knee.

    It’s the human equivalent of taking a 3-speed to the drag strip and grenading the transfer case. Shrapnel everywhere.

    • Irish Sweetness

      ‘Career over’ failed?

      • GP portrayed by Eric Roberts

        I think so.

        • Scharfinator

          Damn, that sucks. Teddy wasn’t my favorite, but that’s pretty tragic regardless.

      • BearDown100393

        Carson Palmer revived a career after a serious knee injury. Hopefully there is some optimism for Bridgewater.

        • Huge Bear’s Penis

          Daunte Culpepper tried but was never the same. Neither Palmer or Culpepper’s knee injuries were this serious.

          • BearDown100393

            Certainly the first knee injury I’ve read reportedly threatening to lose a leg.

          • Yeah, that Bridgewater knee is worse.

            Basically, the the top part of the leg disconnected totally from the bottom part.

            Like twisting off a chicken wing while it’s still hangs by the skin.

      • Big Mike

        I think it migh

    • BerwynBomber

      Wouldn’t be shocked if MIN is drafting a QB next year. Zimmer seems to love Bridgewater as if he were his son, but business is business.

    • BearDown100393

      Anyone else read somewhere/anywhere/out there that Bridgewater could have lost his leg?

      • I saw somebody (media member) tweet that quick action from the trainers likely saved his leg. Nasty.

        • BearDown100393

          I may have saw the same message. Absolutely horrible situation if true.

    • willbest

      Well it probably wasn’t all he wanted, but at least he got paid more than most people in their lives. I hope he was wise with it.

    • SC Dave

      Yikes… poor dude. I guess the goal is to walk normally again?

    • Yeah, MB showed a pic of that type of injury.

      BRUTAL.

      I thought it was hyperbole when they said he’s lucky to still have his leg, yet alone career.

      But after seeing the pic, geesh. No wonder they started praying.

      I don’t know how he avoided nerve damage.

      And how the hell can someone fuck up their knee that bad on non contact? Is that common?

  • BerwynBomber

    “Charles Leno Jr. is the left tackle and I believe was the most underrated player on the 2015 Chicago Bears.”

    Agreed. I thought the O-line were the unsung heroes from last year’s “hey, we’re competitive again” team.

    • SC Dave

      Good to see you active again, BB

      • BerwynBomber

        Thanks, SCD.

    • I think Leno has a chance to make the PB.

      Yeah, I said it!

      He doesn’t have prototypical size, but he flashes.

      He seems better at pass block than run block to me though, unlike the rest of our Oline.

  • Irish Sweetness

    Cuts:

    Alan Ball from the cards, Stephen Paea from the Skins!

    Center Anthony Fabiano, BAL.
    Center C Matt Masifilo, CAR.
    QB Austin Davis, CLE.
    C/G Ruben Carter, MIA.
    C John Sullivan, MIN.
    DT Terrance Knighton. DEN.
    C Patrick Lewis, SEA.
    C Andy Gallik, TEN.

  • Sactowns#1

    I’m curious… what’s everyone’s plan for the beloveds first game?

    • CanadaBear

      Watch it at home if I can.

    • 505Bears

      NFL Package at the house, some beers, and some bbq.

    • Big Mike

      NFL package, portillos combo package delivered to DC area. NFL package, in the Bears Den at my house, with my brother.

      • Bender McLugh

        you know of Windy City Redhots in Leesburg? Closer, and definitely cheaper shipping

        • Big Mike

          I do. I’ve been there often. Picked up sammiches there for Bears games before. Opening day is always Portillos.

        • Big Mike

          How do you know them?

          Sent from Gmail on my iPhone

          • Bender McLugh

            I’m outside DC, Ben there a few times. Vienna Beef ftw

          • Big Mike

            703. Clifton , VA

            Sent from Gmail on my iPhone

          • Bender McLugh

            301 Fredneck, MD

          • Big Mike

            How about that. Leesburg is quite a haul for you. Have you ever been to the Bears fan bar in DC?

          • Bender McLugh

            damn no I haven’t! didn’t even know one existed there. What’s it called?

          • Big Mike

            It’s called the Union Pub. They have a FB group set up. You’ll get a kick out of

            their latest post “We will once again be hosted by Union Pub for all Bears games – and they just bought so much Old Style beer for us that Wrigley Field is
            currently short stocked.DC Bears fans – we have over 400 cases of Old Style to drink this season. #BearDown”

            The comments on their page related to the Bears aren’t very informed. It’s not up to date, but there are a couple of relevant announcements from time to time

            https://www.facebook.com/groups/DCBearsFans/

            The home page for the group is here http://www.dcbearsfans.com/ It’s hardly ever updated.

            This is the union pub web site http://www.dcbearsfans.com/

          • Bender McLugh

            awesome thanks man, I’ll check it out. I rarely find myself in DC for a game, but if I do I’ll drop you a line

          • Big Mike

            I’ve gone 3x to the Union Pub. The issue for me, is finding a driver 🙂 It’s a fun group. The first time was a playoff win in 2010. I was looking to be around fellow believers. The Bears lost the last two time I’ve gone there. I haven’t been back.

    • DaCoaches Mustache

      I’ll be vigorously masterbating with a thumb in my asshole.

      • CanadaBear

        Remind me to never shake your hand if you look even remotely satisfied! No offense, of course!

      • GP portrayed by Eric Roberts

        Reluctantly bent over at the starting time,
        Fingers pumping and thumping with a whine.
        The green light flashes, the pirate feeds go up.
        Churning and burning, Da Coach yearns for a win.
        Edison deftly maneuvers and muscles for rank,
        Grill burning fast on a refilled tank.
        Reckless and wild, Kevin White goes for the burn.
        Their prowess is potent and angry and stearn.
        As they speed through the game, the yellow flags go down.
        The fans get up and they get out of town.
        The arena is empty except for one man,
        Still fingering and jerking as fast as he can.
        The sun has gone down and the moon has come up,
        And long ago players left with their cups.
        But he’s stroking and lubing and fingering the tree fern.
        And thinking of Bears and his heartburn.

        • PaceBot 2000

          Cake?

        • Bender McLugh

          cake-ishly deliscious

    • SC Dave

      I spent the $99, so watching on my computer

      • Sactowns#1

        How did you get it for $99? I thought it was $199.

    • AlbertInTucson

      My living room, if it happens to be on the local FOX affiliate, or my local “I COULD walk there if I wanted to” watering hole if it is not.

      Odds are improved for it to be on the local FOX here in Tucson because The Cardinals (who MUST be aired in this market if they are a Sunday day game) are the Sunday Night game.

    • Huge Bear’s Penis

      Having friends over to the house for all the games. Making sure my bar is stocked this weekend. Everyone is bringing snack foods, not sure what I am doing for main course, yet but leaning towards stuffed pork chops. Just got the home system set up for football. 70 inch TV flanked on each side by 55 inch TVs. So we can watch all games televised in my area.

      • Bender McLugh

        noiice

      • willbest

        sweet setup. I would love to do multiple TV’s but I couldn’t justify that without spending on dish, and I don’t want to spend that $2000 a year for the 4 month football season.

        • Huge Bear’s Penis

          I am lucky, I usually get 3 different games for Noon games and 2 different games for 3pm games on local channels.

          $2000 isn’t bad, besides it’s only money

          • willbest

            $2000 a year is my scotch budget. I would have to drink beer or not put aside for the kids college funds. Or stiff God… he loves football right?

          • Huge Bear’s Penis

            don’t touch the scotch budget, the kids don’t need college funds make them pay for it themselves, and God doesn’t need any money.

      • CanadaBear

        No wonder you’re an upstanding member of the Bear’s fan club!

    • Jokey

      Living room couch w/kids while I try to explain what a first down is.

    • Bender McLugh

      local bar, no longer buying the ticket from Directv. Thought we’d save money but the drinks are just right. there. and they make themselves!

  • I think this would be #1 on my list.

  • BearDown100393

    Marshall more hung up on the Bears than the other way around. Did he really just figure this out now? http://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id/17439125/brandon-marshall-new-york-jets-says-television-work-led-chicago-bears-trade

    • GP portrayed by Eric Roberts

      He didn’t throw Cutler under the bus again. That’s progress.

      • CanadaBear

        Baby Steps!

      • willbest

        Well he knows they are both going to be in Dallas soon if the windcitytribune is to be believed. Gotta get the bromance back.

    • AlbertInTucson

      SMH.

  • GP portrayed by Eric Roberts

    Ha. $25M in inflows in one hour. Somebody thinks things are fucked down there post-Rio

    http://www.proshares.com/funds/bzq_performance_and_quote.html

    • SC Dave

      One fund buying… bfd

  • CanadaBear

    You guys that follow the league closer than me, what’s the chances of trading Hoyer to the Cowgals or the BiQueens? At this point I’d rather go forward with Fales if we could get 5th or higher for Hoyer.

    • SC Dave

      How about a family size bag of chips?

      • CanadaBear

        I’m in!

      • Huge Bear’s Penis

        that still seems a little steep, better make sure it is an off brand bag.

    • willbest

      I am going to go with none. They put Hoyer back in after Shaw went down. Fales is practice squad fodder.

      • CanadaBear

        Pretty sure Fales has no trade value (how could he?) but I was hoping Hoyer might.

        • willbest

          Well maybe they played Hoyer because they wanted him to gain confidence and knock off the rust, but Fales was 4th on the depth chart. And you don’t go from 4 to #2 without earning it unless the team is desperate.

          And it didn’t help that Hoyer shit the bed in the preseason. If you were Dallas or the Vikings what have you seen of Hoyer in the last month that makes you think, that can be our solution this year?

        • MB30SD

          How can you say this?!?!?! I am deeply and irreparably hurt by this statement.

          – irish

          • Irish Sweetness

            Forgive them Father for they know not what they do.

          • MB30SD

            Hahaha

      • Irish Sweetness

        Conor Shaw is a good QB. Hoyer is not. They put Hoyer back in after Shaw went down because they don’t want their investment in Fales going down.

    • Sactowns#1

      Zero. There are much better options out in SF and Cleveland.

    • Won’t happen Canada.

      Hoyer is Chaz Lane’s boy.

      We’d be lucky to get a 5th.

      Also, Dak is drumming up some excitement in Dallas.

      • CanadaBear

        That’s certainly the consensus. I had no idea because he has hung around forever. Oh well.

    • BearDown100393

      Brian Hoyer will die a Chicago Bear.

      • Irish Sweetness

        Hopefully.

  • willbest

    The Irony in the idea that the US government should apply retaliatory taxes to European countries because Apple which dodges US taxes, got called to account by the EU for dodging EU taxes. I did love Tim Cook’s rant about how the EU needs to respect the sovereignty of Ireland though. I don’t know of any multinational that wants to put up with those same sovereign nations regulatory regimes.

    • SC Dave

      The solution is to eliminate corporate taxes entirely.

      FairTax

      • willbest

        No corporations needs to pay taxes. They are entirely constructs of the state, and they create limited liability for the investors, managers, employees. You need to pay for that privilege.

        • SC Dave

          But they never pay. They only collect from someone else, and hence merely add a layer of bureaucracy to the collection process.

          But naturally, lawyers oppose the idea of cutting out the most expensive of all middlemen, themselves.

          • GP portrayed by Eric Roberts

            But they never pay. They only collect from someone else, and hence merely add a layer of bureaucracy to the collection process.

            Huh? What?

          • willbest

            Q: Where does a company get its money to pay its taxes?
            A: From the customers

          • GP portrayed by Eric Roberts

            And?

          • willbest

            That is SC Dave’s point. A tax on a company is really a tax on the products and services that the customers consume. Its shadowy and is used to feed the regulatory bloat that the government imposes on people, and in fact companies are often precluded from even listing it as a “tax” to their customers.

            The fair tax system he proposes puts it all up front so you know how much your government’s take is. The logic there is if people knew how much their government actually cost them, they would be more inclined to question what the hell it was doing.

          • Truth is, almost NO ONE except those inside corporate lawyers and hyenas in Washington know EXACTLY what’s going with the taxes.

            Like they say in the Big Short, it’s complicated so that we DON’T know.

          • willbest

            But if you don’t structure as a limited liability vehicle you are going to charge more for your product to cover your greater risk. And it will be harder to find investors because their risk is greater too. So either way, as the consumer you are going to pay that price. And yes, I can contract with you to limit my exposure to your claims, but I cannot contract with the general public to limit my exposure to their claims.

            Which is why the state comes along and creates that limiting exposure to the general public in order to facilitate commerce but in doing so there needs to be a price for that in order to offset the potential damage to the community if say your satellite blows up on the launch pad and pollutes all over the place, starts fires, etc.

          • Irish Sweetness

            You’re talking limited liabilities, we’re talking human beings. Tax the rich, feed the poor.

          • willbest

            In the US there is an obesity epidemic.

        • Irish Sweetness

          Tax the rich. It’s taxing poor people that makes no sense. You have, you give.

          • willbest

            Corporations are not synonymous with rich.

  • GP portrayed by Eric Roberts

    He’ll compete with 2016 free-agent addition J’Marcus Webb, who looks fully recovered from his knee injury. The 6-foot-7, 331-pounder impressed while playing both right and left tackle for Seattle in last Thursday’s preseason matchup with the Dallas Cowboys at CenturyLink Field.

    http://www.seattlepi.com/sports/football/article/Seahawks-starting-offensive-line-set-almost-9193500.php?google_editors_picks=true

    Webb Nation!

    • Bender McLugh

      hahahha nice, I needed a good laugh

    • Webb is like that hot chick who votes Trumpf, is evangelical, while also showing off her tits on Instagram.

      Everything in your rational being screams “run!” but…that…cleavage and DLPs….

      • BearDown100393

        JWebb is Ann Coulter experiencing a coughing fit.

  • Doc Nitty

    Found out yesterday that I let a chance for a threesome pass me by without even knowing it. I cannot kick myself hard enough. FML.

    • PaceBot 2000

      If the chance was there once it will be there again.

      • Doc Nitty

        Your theories are intriguing to me and I’d like to subscribe to your newsletter.

        • PaceBot 2000

          PaceBot’s Guide To Participating in Coitus Multiplus

      • BearDown100393

        Does that theory also apply toward drafting an undersized white pass rusher with a mediocre spin move?

        • PaceBot 2000

          oh how that theory has fucked us.

    • Huge Bear’s Penis

      Don’t worry about it too much, those chances come about all the time.

      • Doc Nitty

        It took me 41 years for my first opportunity. At this rate, my first threesome will be with boomin grannies in about 41 more.

        • PaceBot 2000

          i saw a german movie about that once.

          • GP portrayed by Eric Roberts

            The Tin Drum?

        • Huge Bear’s Penis

          This is the first opportunity that you know of. From the sounds of it you are not very good at identifying them, so who is to say that you haven’t been propositioned multiple times that you did not realize.

          • Doc Nitty

            Oh sure, grab that knife and twist it.

          • Huge Bear’s Penis

            look on the bright side, now you know what to look for

      • Yeah, 20 years ago I turned down a 3some.

        Still hasn’t happened.

        On the plus side, I just got a bj in the back of a car while holding the hand of another chick who was dressed like Harley Quinn.

        #glassHalfFull

        • Doc Nitty

          Did you sleep in a Holiday Inn Express?

    • CanadaBear

      DAMN!

    • Scharfinator

      They really are once in a life time opportunities. I’m in the same boat as you except a few more years passed knowing I missed it.

      • CanadaBear

        Ditto!

        • AlbertInTucson

          A twosome is all I could ever handle.

          Well, OK, I could handle a ONEsome.

          • CanadaBear

            In my mind I was awesome in my missed chance. Now all I can think is, “Somebody is going to be really bored”. And just like in Euchre, if you’ve got a good hand, play it alone.

  • GP portrayed by Eric Roberts

    Kaperdick wants to take the US flag decal off his helmet.

    • willbest

      He also wants Hillary in prison.

      • BearDown100393

        So does Bill.

    • Huge Bear’s Penis

      Kaepernick has not said he wants to take the flag off the helmet. It was postulated by a writer, and Profootballtalk.com contacted the NFL to see if it was a rules violation.

      • GP portrayed by Eric Roberts

        Damn the web

        • willbest

          If you can’t trust the internet…

      • BearDown100393

        Equipment safety standards is really finicky about protective helmets. Removal (or addition if not pre-approved) of a decal may null/void the helmet’s standard. IMHO more of a legality issue.

        • AlbertInTucson

          If he does anything to the flag on the helmet it’ll be a “Uniform Violation” and the league will spank him for that.

  • willbest

    So now we are talking about Kaepernick’s socks. I miss deflategate.

  • willbest

    Incase you missed it. Hillary wants to go to war with Russia over the DNC hacks. From her speech yesterday:

    “You’ve seen reports. Russia’s hacked into a lot of things. China’s hacked into a lot of things. Russia even hacked into the Democratic National Committee, maybe even some state election systems. So, we’ve got to step up our game. Make sure we are well defended and able to take the fight to those who go after us. As President, I will make it clear, that the United States will treat cyber attacks just like any other attack. We will be ready with serious political, economic and military responses.”

    • Like Ralph Nader said, Hillary has never met a war she didn’t like.

      Hope your nephews, children and grandchildren aren’t around 18 next 4 years.

      I can almost guarantee she’ll get us into some sorta Iraq quagmire, but I guess that’s better than nuclear Holocaust under Trumpf cuz N Korea called his tiny hands “trollish”

      • willbest

        I don’t know why we need to blow up NK. We could just pull out of SK and they will invoke reunification procedures.

      • GP portrayed by Eric Roberts

        I think we need a Qaddafi song.

      • BearDown100393

        There is an awful lot of warfare left to be fought…

    • Huge Bear’s Penis

      won’t happen just stupid campaign rhetoric. If the US treats cyber attacks just like any other attacks, other countries would do the same to the US. Someone would have to be extremely naive to think the US doesn’t hack other nations even allies.

      • Scharfinator

        IIRC, wasn’t it Merkel’s phone?

        • Huge Bear’s Penis

          yep, and did the same thing to French leaders too.

    • BearDown100393

      Russia will neither confirm or deny hacking Da Bears Blog.

      • TBC

        TBC = KGB

      • MB30SD

        nor

        either=or

        neither=nor

    • AlbertInTucson

      She’s hacked off because she’s BEEN hacked and the hacks show what a pathological liar she is.

  • GP portrayed by Eric Roberts

    Here’s some nice pastoral folk from Rog and Dave.

    The blog needs some chill today .

  • FF update

    Ok, so this might be the last update.

    Due to my colosal ignorance of Shabbos, I arranged it on fri night (thinking Sabbath is sat, and not fri night also).

    So, I must reschedule the FF draft yet again.

    Sorry about it, but that way NB could be in. PPl should be free Mon night too since it’s labor day and most ppl getting back (or recovering)

    So, new FF draft date. Mon, Sept 4rth, 10pm Eastern

    This will also hopefully give us a few extra days to get one last team so Irish can join.

    Oh, and Irish, I got ur email, but gotta wait for one last team. Hopefully you can be free tues around the a.m. in case the one last team joins.

    If not, let me know, and I’ll just make it a 10 team league and call it a day.

    So, enjoy ur labor day bitches. If anyone has any more scheduling can’ts, let me know sooner the better.

    PS. Now I know how the NFL schedulers feel!

    • Sactowns#1

      Can you push it to 7:30? I have a 6:30pm draft

    • Irish Sweetness

      No worries bro, I can’t make the Tuesday morning draft anyway (Mon 10PM your end). In work I’m behind a firewall that stops thos draft engines. Can’t do it. I have about 30 teams now anyway.

  • Huge Bear’s Penis

    new thread

    • AlbertInTucson

      Thank you.

  • Rubyploomis1

    Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours and have longer with friends & family! !ie268t:
    On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
    !ie268t:
    ➽➽
    ➽➽;➽➽ http://GoogleFinancialJobsCash508MediaQueenGetPay$97Hour ★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★::::::!ie268t:….,….

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